I drank a lot of coffee this morning. It was gross coffee because the half and half had gone bad. I couldn't quite chew it, but it bordered curdles. The only word to describe it would be glop: it was coffee glop.
Glop reminds me of ooze, which reminds me of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Despite my inexorable fear that it will be a severe disappointment, I desperately want to see that movie. Which brings me to another point:
I saw Grindhouse last night with my bro.
It was disgusting and repulsive and disturbing. In short, everything I love in a movie! It was the best three hours I ever wasted. Oooh oh oh. There's some fantastic female dialogue in the second half of the flick that just tickled me. I'll provide an approximate recreation:
Girl 1: I really don't approve of you carrying a gun
Girl 2 (after some banter about dangerous laundromats): Well what should I carry?
Girl 1: Pepper spray?
Girl 2: Bitch please! Some dick gonna try an' rape me, I ain't gonna give him no skin rash.
Girl 1: Well, what about a knife at least?!
Girl 2: You know what happens to people who carry knives?
Girl 1: No, what?
Girl 2: They get f*ckin shot.
Ok, so maybe you have to watch the movie to appreciate the fabulous character development. So if you can handle poignant gore and excessive expletives, you ought to see it.
... bitch please!
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